Chocolate Starfish March 17, 2010

I spent the afternoon in the sunshine having coffee with one of my friends. She’s a lovely Turkish girl, and one of few I have a nice friendship with.

I have learned a long time ago, I am extremely poor when it comes to giving advice to Turkish girls…..or mindset is just different and most of the time any advice I give fails…much like my own serious love life 🙂

Anyway, we end up talking about a topic that seriously fascinates me here in this country; getting married young and secret relationships with people parents disapprove of.

She explains to me, like many others have that it is just seriously frowned upon to have a sexual relationship with anybody before marriage. However this is changing, and it is much the village and mountain folk that still hang on to this.  Strangely enough it also goes for families that are in a good position or come from money.
She continues that as a girl things are weird…on one hand family pushes you to get educated and an university degree, and once you have one, you should get married as soon as possible and start a family. Turkish girls lash out in all sorts of ways….MySpace is full of them 😉

“So what do you do” I ask “What do you do if you can’t have any sexual relations because you should enter marriage as a virgin“. Well apparently there are plenty of ways to have sex and in your mind still be a virgin…She tells me it is very common that you don’t have sex the regular way, up the bum is much better and your ‘virginity’ stays in tact.

I choke on my cappuccino…..up the backdoor?!?!?! what…with just any guy?!?!
Call me a prude, but that to me that is a special place…entry is not common, and access is only granted to a select few. All of a sudden it dawns on me that this is why some of the guys I slept with immediately went for the back side, only to be told off by me if anything bigger than a finger came close.

Wow…I hadn’t been shocked by anything in a long time…I now look at the cash register girl from the supermarket with completely different eyes!!

5 things that put me off in a woman March 15, 2010

Oh I love women, love looking at them, love being with them! But there are many things in a woman that totally put me off. Living here in Turkey it is not hard at all to hook up with a girl/woman, it might have something to do with not sleeping with men before marriage or just in general the dirty mind that seems to flourish here…I have no complaints, many of my best escapades here have been with ladies.

Now as for the top 5 of things that seriously put me off:

1 – Foul mouths
As I have a total soft spot for extreme feminine type of women, what totally can put me off is a woman or girl that drops the f-bomb regularly. Not only the f-bomb but a foul mouth in general. Cursing, swearing and poor speaking (sort of Color Purple talk where it seems no correct sentences can be formed). This woman can be as hot as jalapeno peppers, but if she open her mouth and filth comes out….I’m gone.

2 – 70ies bush
I know we were all created in a certain way, and the hair has a specific reason to be there. Doesn’t mean we should leave it there and let it grow out of our panties! I can understand not everybody is in to the chicken cutlet look, but that area should be hairless or extremely short trimmed. In Turkey I have yet to run into a lady with a furry peach, here it is common practice for both men & women to have that area fur free. Taking a woman home, getting all excited and accidentally ending up in a forest is a reason for me to immediately evict you from the bedroom. (If she’s real attractive I would ask if I’d be  allowed to take a razor to it before continuing). I think it’s fair to say that armpit fuzz and shin fuzz fall in to the same category.

3 – Arrogance
Some women are just more attractive than others. In the end it of course comes down to taste, but still….not everybody has the face & body of Venus. But women who think they’re better than whatever other people are out there, put me off. Sometimes you can see it in posture…quite often it is disguised as self confidence, only to find out it is arrogance by the way conversation is going and physical give aways. A woman that is arrogant turns instantly in to a troll covered with warts in my eye….very very off putting!
4 – Insecurity
Sure we are not all completely 100% confident all of the time, but women (and men by the way) that need constant reassuring, I find very unattractive. I find it so unattractive that it can actually anger me. Get on with it! Trust yourself, you don’t need a crotch to lean on for everything.

5 – Man imitators
I can be very short about this…Women that act like a man once you are in bed.
If I wanted to sleep with a man….I would have picked up a guy. No matter how much fun we had outside the bed…if you are one of these, most probably I will never call you again.
These are the most important things that put me off, however….I love the ladies, so I’m always open to compromise and persuasion!